It's a lover's final breath
by littlevampk
Summary: You know you love cliché. AU-high school.
1. Prologue

******Prologue**

_**He looks at me. I fake a smile so he won't see what I want and I need,  
and everything that we should be.**_

_Tony talks to me, I laugh cuz' he's just so funny.  
__And I can't even see anyone when he's with me._

_~o~_

_Steve walks by me. Can he tell that I can't breath?  
__And there he goes, so perfectly,  
__the kind of flawless I wish I could be.  
_

* * *

Steve and Tony had been best friends ever since Steve's mom died when he was 12, and Howard Stark decided to take care of him.

At age 15, all good and responsable Steve decided to stop living in the Starks mansion's house guest and go to live in an apartment near school - he refused to let Howard pay for it, and so he got a job as waiter in Thor's dad's restaurant-. Tony had joked about going with him.

Throwing a big tantrum about his best friend leaving Tony asked his father to take him out of his private school and into public school with Steve. Howard didn't say no, didn't care much.

Tony remained at Steve's shadow for about 3 hours, after that, everybody knew who Tony Stark was.

Everybody loved him. Others were jealous.

Steve laughed inside as Tony winked at him. _Of course he was enjoying this. _

"So that is the jackass you have for best friend?" Natasha had asked him one day. Steve just shrugged with a smile. Sometimes he didn't get it himself either. Why him? Why Tony? They were probably the most different people ever. But it didn't matter, because Tony was always that missing part of him. The part he didn't have and he needed.

Steve didn't have that many friends, mostly because of his shyness and difficulty to make a conversation after knowing someone. So he was basically friends with people that really wanted to be his friends. To do headcount, there was Thor, his most loyal friend inside high school and his FB in the football field. Natasha, probably the only woman that could make him feel tiny and helpless and his French classmate. And then there was Clint, captain and proud founder of the archery high school club, Steve considered Clint his friend ever since he saw sparkles lit up between him and Natasha in one of his birthdays small party -because hell no, you can't be Tony Stark's best friend and not have a birthday celebration-.

Days passed and Tony slowly won over almost all sciencey class and team there ever was. And that's how Steve added Bruce Banner to his trust circle. Those two would rule the world one day, Steve was sure. He got a bit jelaous about Tony and Bruce's sudden friendship but he shoke it off eventually.

Tony's charisma made all Steve's friends like him. And he soon made some friends alone himself. Like Pepper Potts.

Steve saw Tony's eyes spark when he met her in Steve's art group. She, with him, where the leaders of it. Pepper was great, Steve agreed. And if Tony was into her, Steve couldn't be more happy.

That's why when he got closer to Peggy Carter, Tony was all over the place getting him to ask her out.

And under the lights of the stars, in a party provided by Tony, two days before they started their junior year, he asked her to be his girlfriend.

Two days after that, Tony decided to man-up and do the same with Pepper.

And by the fresh start of high school, they both had brand new girlfriends.

* * *

The year past almost as fast as they wished for.

It was a good year, all of them could agree, but something told Steve that this year would be much better.

And it had nothing to do with the fact that they were seniors now, he told Tony one morning.

* * *

**ok I feel ashamed lol. YES i got inspired by a Taylor Swift song, what's the problem? **

**anyway, as the summary says, you know you love cliche :P **

**first of all I want to tell you that I have the whole plot in my head so dont think this would roll around shit after the first three chapters. so, please have a little faith.**

**second, im starting my own sort of au-universe with this story. I will be doing something short after I finish this and basically it'd be like the continuation of this story, only it'd be a little different. afksdlgdfg  
anyway i dont wanna spoil the fun. **

**also, I know there are _many _au-high school/college fics out there, so any resemblence here is mere coincidence. because I've only read 3 and im making my own very different since i didn't like some stuff of each one :) _  
_**

**anyway, read, tell me what you think and remember you can tell me to shut up**


	2. You're The Biggest Idiot of 2012' Award

"So you're basically telling me that you aren't excited about us graduating?" Tony sounded annoying in the speaker

"I'm telling you it's awesome but I don't think you should try to give Principal Fury a heart attack" Steve replied him as he got out of his house.

"It's just a harmless prank" Steve rolled his eyes "are you getting out of your house? Wait there, I'm picking you up" Tony said before he could say anything.

About five minutes later, Tony's Acura made the street glow.

"Get in bitch, we're going shopping" he said to his best friend with a smile.

"Don't you think Mean Girls jokes are a bit too old?" Steve said going near to the too-expensive-to-his-liking car.

"Not a bit" he replied taking off his glasses and showing the big brown eyes. "How are ya'? I haven't seen you in a week. Are you cheating on me? Cuz' I'll be honest, I'm the best best friend you could ever ask for" Steve only looked at his very babbling friend and smiled as he buttoned his seat belt.

"Like that could ever happen. I'm sorry I've been kinda busy with the restaurant" Steve explained as Tony drove them to school.

"And Carter" Tony murmured with a shrug. Steve looked down.

Peggy Carter. Steve's little perfect girlfriend. Steve bit his bottom lip slightly when the thought he'd been avoiding for the whole week came back.

He hadn't talked to Tony for about two weeks let alone seen him, and all of that was because he had been busy between his paid job and the one he voluntarily offered at the Carter's family new house.

He helped Peggy's dad re-model the abandoned house and then tried to spend some time with his girlfriend, because of her mom's offer –more like demand–. They liked Steve very much.

The thing was, Steve spent almost the whole summer with his friends more than he did with Peggy. But it was ok because she wasn't even there to feel bad. Peggy went to a special summer camp – one Tony very rudely declined, because he's apparently too smart for that– that consisted of spending your time recreating in a pool and learning about mechanical engineering until you were able to make either a) a paper mache volcano or b) a nuclear bomb.

Peggy came back and gave Steve probably one of the best gif he had ever received –but don't tell Tony–: a motorcycle. It was old but Peggy was proud that she re-built it herself and Steve had taken her in his arms and kissed her like he was sure she had missed.

And after that, it all happened.

After that Steve went every day to help at Peggy's house after work. After that Steve stopped hanging out with Thor to play basketball. After that he started missing movie nights at Clint's place.

After that he had no time to text Tony.

And after that –two weeks ago, exactly–, right after he kissed Peggy goodbye in her porch and hung the phone when he called her to say he got home alright, right after that he realized it. He didn't love her anymore.

It was boredom, he told himself. How could he stop loving Peggy? She was everything he ever wanted. She was funny, she was carefree, she was smart. She was tons of things Steve would want in a woman. But something in his heart didn't felt right.

The strange feeling got lost when he reached to his phone and saw a message from Tony:

'_u busy? nailing Carter? hehe, get out. i brought u pizza :)'_

And it was simple, it really was. Tony made him feel fine. Like with his carefree attitude he made Steve feel a little carefree himself.

They ate pizza and they talked, and Steve realized something else that night: he had really and truthfully missed Tony. Tony above all the others. Steve didn't want to start thinking why.

And then he spent two weeks again without talking nor seeing him.

"Hey," Tony called while Steve was too busy with his thoughts "ok so I just mention her and you go to a whole other world. Someone has fallen really hard, huh. Should I take you to a doctor instead?" Tony showed his 20K grin and Steve looked at him, hoping his best friend could read him so he won't have the need to actually get the words out "omg, what is it?" Tony's voice sounded really worried, Steve regretted he didn't say anything.

"It's not a big deal. I should leave it for after-school conversation" Tony took the glasses off again and stopped at a red light.

"Ok, spill it. And please don't tell me you'll marry her because I will seriously throw you out of the car" Steve frowned. Peggy and Tony weren't the friendliest, ever. But they did get along because, well, they were really alike. "that's the most basic cliché of the history of high school loves"

"I'm not marrying her" Steve said when the light got green and Tony drove again.

"So, what is it?" he asked looking at the road "you got a decease? Look, I'm telling you, Carter is more dangerous than you give her credit for…" Steve took his left hand to his forehead, unsure if Tony was at all able to listen.

"I'm not sick, and neither is Peggy"

"So did you?" Tony almost stopped the car in the middle of the street to ask the-why-so-important-question.

"Can we not talk about my lack of sexual experience at 7am?" Steve could feel his blush, shamefully glowing red. Tony laughed a little and went back to the road.

"Ok so could you please tell me what happened?!"

"If you'd let me!" Steve scolded him.

"Fine, I'll shut up. But we have to talk about that too. Leave that as the after-school conversation, would ya'?" Steve rolled his eyes. Would Tony ever leave the topic alone?

"I….what do you think of me and Peggy?" Steve inquired. Tony frowned and took the glasses on again as they entered the school parking lot.

"What do I think of you of what?" Tony played dumb and Steve gave him a dirty look "Hey, I'm the one who pushed you to ask her out, what do you think?" Steve didn't answer "I like her, I mean not for me because honestly she thinks too much of herself, but she's fine to you"

"Do you…do you think she loves me?"

"Oh, is that what this is about? Oh you little insecure ball of cuteness" Steve seriously hated Tony's very original and characteristic nicknames "I think she is nuts about you, Steve. Who wouldn't?" Tony parked the car in a place where everybody could see it, the bragger. "Why do you think otherwise? Did she say something?" Tony asked as he turned the car off.

"No, uhm, she's not the problem. The problem is…well…me" Steve finally said, but Tony only got more confused.

"Ok you lost me now" he frankly said. Tony got out of the car with his classic attitude on. Steve was always amused to see him walk. He did it as if there were people with cameras all around him. People were staring but Tony took it to a whole higher level. He was a show off. He was a _diva_.

"Do you really have to do that every time you arrive?" he asked Tony once.

"I can't help the way I was born" he shrugged when Steve joined him at the middle of the parking lot "If you don't like it, don't watch" he told him before taking the ray-bans off and winking at some girls. That day Steve thought of how Tony would be once they were seniors.

Not much different, by the way.

Tony was on his Argentinean leather jacket, white t-shirt underneath it and Armani blue jeans. The same tiger print ray-bans were shining that day. Steve almost felt ashamed of walking next to him in his Aeropostale blue shirt and his old worn cowboy jeans.

"I think I'm gonna break up with her" he said when there weren't many people listening. Tony turned his back to him again and Steve was unable to tell what he was thinking.

He was unable to ask him either once the bell ringed.

"STARK!" Principal Fury's voice was heard through almost the whole school –and Steve would dare to say the whole city–.

"Ok, I gotta run. See you at lunch?" Tony asked him completely forgetting about the subject.

"That's if you're still alive" Steve said but the gaze he gave him showed a little worry.

Tony disappeared in the crowd and Steve kept thinking about how did Tony managed to piss off Principal Fury and get away with it.

There were rumors about him. Dark rumors about him being from the military. Others about him being a super secret CIA agent. And the most crazy ones –that of course he heard from Clint– about him being an alien who's purpose on Earth was to study us all and find our weakness to then call his giant army of super powerful aliens –and in who's Mr. Coulson, the Math teacher, was the leader of– and rule the world.

Steve doubted if Barton had kept in touch with Thor's adoptive brother Loki.

He saw, at the end of the hall, Peggy running, obviously late for her class. Steve decided not to bother her but she saw him then and walked to him.

"You won't guess what I did" she said between laughs "I made a confetti bomb and I put it in Fury's office" she said before Steve could talk, and then she started laughing again.

"I'd say I'm surprise, but that'd be a lie" he said making a face, Peggy turned back to see him and then she took him by the neck.

"Come here, handsome" she said before putting their lips together. Steve felt bad, he felt really bad. Because he had been letting Peggy kiss him and then gently avoid those goodnight I love you's by not calling her at all.

He had to tell her. It didn't mean they were breaking up. He had to have the same conversation he had with Tony with her. _How do you feel about us? Do you still feel the same you felt a year ago? Are you bored?_ Steve was desperately wishfully thinking that Peggy would feel the same. But it didn't seem so.

Peggy broke the kiss apart and looked at him like she only could. Her facial expression changed totally "What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing…uhm…just, nervous to start senior year" he faked a smile, and Peggy read it before he could even finish.

"Seriously, Steve" she tried again.

"I don't…I don't really wanna talk about it now…you're late for your class and so am I and-"

"Steve"

"_Peggy_" Steve wasn't taking Peggy only-child stubborn attitude today. He needed to think it through before he throws it all away and might totally regret it after. Yeah, that was the plan.

Peggy narrowed her eyes. Steve sighed knowing that he'd only get away with this until lunch time, but by then he hoped he had fix a very good lie.

Peggy stared once more and Steve just nodded.

"Is it a bad or a good thing?" she asked, the brown big eyes glowing with curiosity.

"I think you have to go to your class. Mr. Batty isn't nice to seniors" Steve warned about Tony's almost most hated teacher.

"You're kidding? Stark must be doing his regular 'let's humiliate the teacher with my intelligence in a way that even stupid people will get it on the first day of school'. I'd rather skip that, thanks" Steve imagined how a class of physics would be with Tony. Very funny, that's how.

"Why?" he got distracted because Tony was the topic now.

"It's funny, but Stark can be annoying. In my opinion, he's too full of himself" Steve tried not to laugh. But he failed "Anyway, don't change the subject ok? What's in your head?" she took him by the neck and showed her genuine worry about her boyfriend. Steve had to be careful with her. All in all, Steve didn't want her to be hurt.

"I'll see you at lunch, ok?" Peggy moved her head up a bit so Steve would kiss her but he awkwardly left a soft kiss on her forehead instead. Then he gave her one of his only-for-her smile and took off.

_~o~_

Tony tried to level down. He really did. But everybody was fucking stupid and he was too smart for their shit.

"I don't care what you say. I don't care what you think you know. I'm the teacher and I know what I'm telling you, Mr. Stark" Mr. Baty told Tony for about three times by now. The whole classroom was listening. Some even took their phones and started recording.

"I get is hard for you, to admit to your whole class that one of your students is smarter than you but given that I'm said student I wouldn't take it too hard on myself" Tony shrugged at the teacher and closed his notebook.

"Mr. Stark you're disrespectful and you need to get your ego down"

"Yeah, we can all agree to that. But the point here is that I am smarter than. _you. The teacher_" Tony replied, putting his hands on the back of his head and crossing his legs he added "And then he sent me here" he explained Fury.

"He got mad about that? Oh, unbelievable" Fury stank of sarcasm and Tony rolled his eyes.

"What are you writing down anyway?" Tony asked when Fury went back to his laptop computer "Did you like my surprise?" he asked raising an eyebrow. Fury didn't look back to him.

"Yeah, yeah. Coulson in a spandex, very funny. You should try to close Photoshop and focus on something else, Stark" Fury said and Tony felt proud "The confetti was a little unlike you, though"

"I don't know what confetti you're talking about and yeah, I wish I had photoshoped that one" Tony said making a face "You go on vacation with your family and you certainly don't expect to see that" Tony said opening his eyes, faking horror. But then he realized Fury wasn't even looking "Can you please tell me what you're emailing my father, Nick?" Tony demanded annoyed.

"I'm telling him that you need mental help. But we both know how that's gonna go" he told him closing the laptop when he finished.

"New balls for the basketball team and new uniforms for the cheerleaders? Yeah" Tony didn't want to be thinking about his father's lack of care to him in his first day as senior, so "can I go now?" he asked annoyed.

"Yes, but you won't go to Mr. Batty's classroom, I'm changing your schedule tomorrow" Tony gave out a long breath.

"Thank you, that guy is a ball of stupidity. I couldn't take another hour of listening to him" Fury gave him a dirty look. He lost count of how many teachers he had fired because he took Tony's words about their effectiveness.

"Don't get in trouble until next week, Stark, please" Fury's voice gave a slight sound of annoyance in the back, very difficult to hear. Tony knew he was annoyed because, well, he just _knew._

He got out of the office and then took his phone out.

'_free of physics. where ya' ?' he texted. _

'_I'm studying, as you should be; what did you do now?' _

'_nothing. people can't handle my awesomeness. and by people I mean Batty… and your girlfriend' _

'_ha, she did say something about that' _

'_carter talks about me? how lame. sorry ;)'_

'_yeah, basically that you're cocky and you're not even that smart ;)'_

'_what would she know -.-?'_

'_nothing that I do, for sure. Hey, I gotta go. Teacher's watching me :S'_

Tony sighed and then texted again.

'_free from physics. what r u doing? (k)'_

'_You made Mr. Green yelled at Steve, Tony. What did you do now?'_

'_did I? tell the big guy I'm sorry. but how did you know it was me? And I did nothing harmless btw'_

'_because you're predictable like that, honey. And yeah, I'm sure" _

'_can you skip the class? I'm bored and Steve doesn't reply anymore'_

'_that's because Mr. Green took away his phone. And no, I happen to listen to my classes because I'm not super-smart and I'm not rolling in money'_

'_you say the nicest things *.*'_

_'Bye 3'_

And that's how the next 45 minutes Tony spent them thinking about the last thing he thought he would: Steve and Peggy's relationship and why would Steve ever want to break up with her?

Tony remembered the first time he met Peggy. Because yes, he met her first. Actually, if not for him Steve and Peggy wouldn't be together by now, he was proud to admit.

She was reckless and she wasn't scared to show off the teacher either. She was first in math class and two days after Tony, she was second.

Tony bit his tongue thinking in many ways he could make their sexual tension break but two days after he left Steve in his art group and met Pepper. Then he couldn't care less about Peggy Carter. Until he saw her going all dizzy about Steve. And Steve was all cute and red every time Tony said something about them.

So, what happened now? What did Peggy do? Because he was pretty sure it was Peggy the one who screwed it up.

Maybe she slept with someone. Nah, Steve wouldn't have looked so sad when he said that he was going to break up with her. Steve's look was more like sadness about her. Like the look on Steve's eyes when he watches Bambi. He doesn't feel bad for himself, because, he says, his mom died, nobody killed her, but poor little Bambi didn't even had his bad luck. Tony had face-slapped himself that night. Only Steve got over-emotional over Disney characters.

Anyway, back to the important matter. Was Steve heart broken or not? That's something Tony found himself really bother by. Because broken bike's engine? Yeah, that was easy to fix. Heartbroken Steve? Yeah, _he might as well kill someone_.

No one messes with his blue-eyed cap.

The bell ringing was what woke up Tony from his thoughts. He took off to English and spent it texting Clint about Fury and his super secret alien work. Tony laughed hard when Steve told him that Clint was freaking out about some rumor about Fury. That guy believed everything.

~o~

Steve tried to focus in French. Steve tried to focus in Geography. But all he kept thinking was in how he would tell Peggy instead of thinking in a lie that will calm her down or thinking of reasons why he was still in love with her. The big fat problem was that he wasn't anymore. Steve thought of today in lunch. No, too soon. Steve thought of next week after the opening games. No, too long.

Steve thought many ways of starting. _We need to talk. I need to tell you something. This is what is going on_– and the list went on and on.

As he walked through the hall to find Tony, who just texted him –he'd been texting him all day–, Peggy came from behind.

"Hey there" she said scaring him a bit. Especially because Steve wasn't paying many attention to what was happening around him.

"Hey" he said dryly after Peggy left a kiss on his cheek.

"So, are you ready to talk about it?" she wasn't slow to ask.

"Peggy, what– there's nothing to talk about" he faked. Peggy put her eyes in line in a way that made Steve thought of that meme Clint always used.

"Steve please, you're killing me" and that was it. That's what made Steve's stomach burn and get small, and _hurt_ so much that Steve put his hand on it to check if he wasn't stabbed.

Peggy was too small, too fragile in Steve's mind. He couldn't do this. Hell, he couldn't picture those beautiful brown eyes filled with tears. Not over him. Not over _anything_. Peggy was his. His to protect. Even if he didn't love her anymore, he would punch whoever would hurt her. And in this point, it was himself.

"I just...there a lot of things going in my head right now, Peggs. College and what I'll do... –" he tried but,

"You'll paint in Rome. Or anywhere in Europe. Steve, don't roll it around, you're not worried about your future" she told him, knowing better than he gave her credit for in his imaginary-Peggy –the one he had been making answer in his break up scenarios in his mind during French class–. "You're worried about something, what is it?" Now she sounded more annoyed than worried, but still curious.

Steve started walking because the halls started to get crowded. Peggy followed like it was gravity for her.

"Steve–"

"Peggy, you don't want to hear it. Trust me, not right now"

"Oh c'mon. You think I'll be able to sleep tonight knowing that something's going on in your head? Something that's freaking big because you have 'Worry' written all over your face. Jesus, you look like if you'd knocked me up" she told him in a volume that was loud for him to see that she was a bit worried and mad because he won't tell her anything but not loud enough to be an scene.

"Peggy, please I–"

"Oh my God, you cheated on me?" she asked, but it sounded like a statement.

"What– no! Why would you think I'd do that?!" Steve wasn't happy she thought that way of him. Peggy straightened up and then let her stare loose up a bit.

"Then– ugh, what is it?" Peggy gave out a sound full of desperation and if Steve didn't knew her better -and if Peggy was like the rest of the girls- he'd thought she was about to cry.

"I–" with the corner of his eyes he saw Tony walking holding hands with Pepper. Tony waved at him and then realized what was happening. Tony let his hand fall and his face frown. _I'm here for you_– Steve heard without Tony opening his mouth.

"You don't love me anymore" Peggy said not really looking at him. Steve took his eyes from Tony and dropped them to the floor.

"I don't know" he simply said. And it was true. It really was. "I told you I needed to think about it"

"And what should I do while you're doing that? Run in the meadows thinking 'oh I'm so happy because I have a perfect boyfriend who loves me'?" Peggy didn't sound angry; Steve wasn't sure how she felt but at least he could scratch anger.

"You're– you're right. That's not fair for you" Steve looked the floor for one more second and then he turned his gaze back to her "Peggy, I'm so–so sorry" Steve's voice was giving up. This was hard for him. Peggy was– she was something he thought would be forever. He could picture himself marrying her. Seeing their kids grow up.

He could picture himself getting old with her on his side. Leaving this world knowing he loved and was loved back.

But that wasn't happening.

Because right now all he could picture was_ him leaving her_.

Peggy gave one of her perfect little smiles to Steve as she put her hand on his cheek "don't be. I'm actually surprised we lasted this long, Steve" she tried to joke, but her voice broke and so she swallowed "you deserve better" she whispered and Steve moved his head to one side, trying to tell her she was wrong. Better than her wasn't going to be easy to find. "Yeah, you do" she said again.

"Peggy that's not–"

"That's not why you're leaving me. I know" she said and Steve saw her eyes sparkle because of the tears that were forming up already. "And even if it was, you wouldn't say either" she moved her shoulders slightly. Steve wanted to slap himself.

"Peggy–"

"I gotta go" she said before one tear fell. Peggy Carter wasn't anywhere near letting someone see her cry.

Steve didn't watch her go. He stared at the floor for minutes longer until he felt a gentle hand brushing his shoulder.

"Do I have to insult someone?" was all Tony said once Steve's eyes got up.

"Just...me" Steve said in a shrug, because yes he deserved the 'you're the biggest idiot of 2012' award.

"Fine, then you're an idiot for letting Steve run away" Steve gave him a frowned look "what? That was the insult I had prepared" Tony said as if anything wasn't a big deal. And for Tony Stark nothing really was.

Steve worries faded for a moment when he saw Tony's big superstar smile. What he would give to be a little like Tony.

"C'mon' we'll get ice cream after school. And I'm yours for the rest of the day" and for the smallest moment Steve was a little happy again.

* * *

**finally! ok i needed to grow up some balls to upload the chapter. I hope you guys have faith in this because I know this episodes are silly but the action will come. promise. **

**anyway, yeah I made Steve and Peggy break up :( but that's better than her dying sooooo...**

**enjoy ;) and remember you can tell me when to stop...**


	3. The Milkshake Couple Special

"You didn't have to do this" Steve said as they entered a very crowded ice cream shop.

"I know. I'm doing it because I want to, Steve" Tony said trying to open space for the both of them and looking for a table.

"You know, today is your anniversary with Pepper, I don't wanna spoil that" Steve said frowning. He really couldn't believe Tony was going to spend his anniversary with him instead of his girlfriend. Tony turned around because he could, actually, feel Steve feeling bad in his back.

Narrowing his eyes, he told him "Steve, c'mon. She has volleyball practice and then she has to go visit her grandmother," Steve took a moment to look at his best friend, still feeling bad "It's not like I'm gonna be with her at all today" he said and then slightly ran off to a table that just got free. Steve set down touching his forehead; he really wasn't in the mood today. "Anyway, you have a lot explaining to do so I suggest you to begin" Tony said a little louder trying to call Steve's attention since the table had got a lot interesting for the last minutes. "What are you going to order?" he asked looking at his phone.

"I don't know, this place is full. You sure we can't go somewhere else?" Tony shook his head.

"Nope. You know I like the ice cream here"

"Why are we eating ice cream at all?" he asked as Tony waved his hand to a waitress.

"Because you're heartbroken and ice cream is the best. Darce!" he called their brunette friend. Steve looked up again.

"Hey, Tony- Steve, hi! What are you guys doing here?" Jane's best friend asked them.

"We're here to have a salad" Tony said sarcastically.

"Don't joke, we sell salads too" she said with a smile and rolling her eyes "I don't know what my boss is thinking, but anyway, what are you guys going to order?"

"Just the usual" he said and Darcy made a noise clicking her tongue.

"We ran out of ice cream. We only have the couple milkshake special" she explained.

"What's that?" Steve wondered.

"We'll is basically a milkshake, like size-gigantic, whatever flavor, with two straws and you can add two extra flavor toppings" she told them.

"That sounded extra-sugary" Steve said and Darcy nodded with a shrug.

"And extra-awesome, bring two of those" Tony asked and she gave him a frowned face.

"Ugh, sorry. It's one for couple, that's the policy"

"What kind of business logic does your boss have, anyway?" Tony told her making a face.

"I don't get it either" she simply replied "So, what are you going to do? Because damn wouldn't you look pretty drinking a milkshake together" she joked and Tony laughed, and for whatever reason Steve felt something itching in his stomach.

"You know what? I won't have anything" Steve said and Tony gave him a half-mad look, like if he was a child behaving un-correctly "I don't feel like drinking anything, anyway"

"Ugh, fine. Bring one, Darce. Guess the big guy is afraid to jeopardize his image" Steve looked at him dry. "I'm joking" Tony said opening his mouth widely, and Darcy left laughing "Are you going to start talking or what?"

"I don't even know what you want me to say"

"Well, first of all, what happened? Because last time I saw you, you were all 'Peggy this, Peggy that' and all the sudden you break up with her?" Steve shrugged and went back to stare at the table.

"I wish I could tell you what went wrong. But I don't even know" Tony shook his head and looked to another side.

"Oh, please, you know or you're just playing dumb, there's no third option, there's no 'I don't know'" Steve looked at him this time. Tony was looking at him superbly, like if he saw something Steve didn't but Steve shook his head.

"I swear I don't. Is just- is just like when you fall in love" he made a pause to look at Tony to see if he knew what he was talking about. Tony's face was unreadable "You know when one day you go to bed and you're totally fine, but then you wake up and all you're thinking about is a single person, and then all the sudden you realize you're in love" Steve kept talking but Tony was already rambling "Well that's sort of what happened, only backwards" Steve said looking at his fingers now. Tony took a long pause of looking at him and then somewhere else.

"So you're not in love with her anymore?" was all he asked before the question got lost when the huge milkshake arrived. "Wow, that's a mother milkshake there" the waitress that left it wasn't Darcy, and she wasn't in the mood either.

"You're gonna get diabetes with that" Steve tried to scold, but Tony was already tasting the thing.

"It's really good" he said taking another sip as he took some Choco chips of the container and added his topping "What do you want?" he asked Steve. Steve motioned his hand side to side.

"I told you, I don't want anything. I'm already feeling sick just looking at you" he said narrowing his eyes.

"Oh, please, this is way too much" Tony said complaining, but he didn't stop drinking the milkshake "Here, I'll add strawberries, you like them, right? Pepper's allergic to them" Tony spoke adding strawberries in the top of the milkshake "Try it" he said with the straw on his mouth. Steve rolled his eyes and leaned his head to try the sweet thing.

Centimeters away from Tony's face, their eyes met, and Steve almost feels like drowning. _There was that stomach feeling again. _

He went back to his place, still coughing.

_-o-_

"Straight my ass" Clint said looking at his two friends from the counter.

"Yes, that's very straight. Why are we talking about your backside, Clint?" Jane asked from behind him. He looked back at her and found her cleaning the blenders.

"Look at those two" Jane moved next to him and looked at the couple of guys Clint was pointing not-so-discretely at "We made a bet that they end up together by the end of the year" he explained.

"What did you bet for?" she asked him smiling.

"This week" he said and Jane moved to clean the counter.

"You're going to lose" she said shrugging before looking back at Steve and Tony in the table and then going back to clean.

"Really? Look at them! In fact, Steve broke up with his girlfriend today so-"

"Hey, I'm not saying the guys won't get together, I'm just saying not this week. Look at them, they're nowhere near even realizing the feelings they have"

"Ugh, they're both being stupid. I think they should just speak up and be done with it" Clint said turning his back. "And now they're going to cost me 15 bucks"

"You shouldn't make stupid bets, and it's not like you could talk anyway" she said narrowing an eyebrow at Clint.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's been a year and you haven't asked Natasha out" she told Clint, treating him like if he was his little brother.

"I am not-"

"Don't bother" Jane said shaking her head.

"Look, it's hard, ok? There are a lot of things at stake here, like our friendship… and my balls" Jane laughed and Clint went back to work.

_-o-_

"Anyway, how are the practices?" Tony said after taking a napkin and cleaning his mouth. Steve half smiled looking at him.

"The usual. Since when do you care?"

"That's mean, I care" Steve looked at him with his eyebrows making a straight line "Fine, I don't, I'm just trying to make conversation. Don't judge, you're always asking what Bruce and I are doing at the lab. It's not like you can even understand" Tony said opening his eyes without looking at Steve.

"Now, who's being mean?-

"My friends!" that was Thor's voice, echoing in the whole place. Steve waved at him.

"Now, I'm afraid to jeopardize my reputation" Tony whispered slightly burring himself in the seat. Thor Odinson, or just Thor since his last name was too ridiculous to say it out loud. He was Steve's weirdest friend, and damn he had weird friends. Tony had learned to like them all but they were still weird. An archer who clearly had hidden skills, a woman that soon would grow to be a licensed-professional murder, and this guy. Tony shook his head in disapproval once but soon enough he realized they were all nice guys.

"Are you serious?" Steve asked Thor with a huge smile on his face as Thor nodded with a bigger smile. Tony wondered how many time he spent thinking about his friends.

"I am not, Steve. We will be confronting against the mighty team of the East High School" oh yeah, and there was the way he spoke, he came from Norway and the guy had a hard time talking English like a normal teenager.

"I get that's a good thing?" he called their attention. Steve nodded and then they started talking about more football and Tony for only that second wished to be with Pepper instead of Steve.

A couple of hours later, Thor took his order home and then Tony and Steve left.

"Thanks…for uhm- today. You didn't have to"

"Don't start" Tony asked him stopping in front of the old small building. "How do you rather live here than my gorgeous guest house?" Tony had come to Steve's apartment only twice ever since he moved. They always went to Tony's house instead.

"Because I do"

"Say what you mean, you hate me" Tony shrugged and then smiled at his best friend.

"You have no idea" Steve told him smiling too. Tony sighed unsure of what he wanted. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing- uhm" Tony gave a dry laugh "I don't know"

"Is it Pepper?" Steve wondered turning in the passenger seat to face Tony.

"No, uhm- it's me. I don't wanna go home" Steve made a 'hmh' noise and gave his friend a sympathetic look "Or maybe I'm bored, are you sure you have to go? The night's still young"

"Tony, we have school tomorrow…" Tony shrugged and avoided Steve's eyes "Tony, it isn't that bad"

"Is hell…is hell" he repeated "I feel like hanging myself most of the time"

"Tony…"

"What?"

"He's you father" and that was it. Tony's dysfunctional family driving him crazy as usual. It was 7:30 and he didn't want to go to his own house. "Well, I'd ask you to stay but I don't have much room for you" Tony made a chuckle noise and Steve shrugged. After all his friend did understood.

"No, you know, I'll call Pepper and see if she's not busy anymore" Tony said looking down and then at Steve "Maybe I can spend the night with her" he raised an eyebrow and Steve felt something wrinkling inside of him.

"Sure" he whispered.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow then" Tony said giving him his 20K grin and Steve felt his heart rushing as he realized how pretty Tony's smile was.

_-o-_

School sucks. There's no one to deny that. Not even the teachers, anyone.

What was good about starting school were the opening games. Volleyball, football and even archery, thanks to Clint now. Tony wasn't a sport fan kind of person but he sure as hell liked the cheerleaders. And the crowd, and getting to know new people, and all that stuff that Steve didn't like very much.

Especially because he throws this huge party and pisses his father the hell off.

Yeah, so good times.

This year Steve's team was going to play against the best football team of the city, so they were all very eager.

"You'll do great, Steve" Pepper told him at the party and Steve smiled at her, the bright medal shining in her neck.

"Not as great as you did today, I'm sure" he replied to her. Tony came from behind and grabbed her from her waist to his side.

"You should've seen her, she was on fire" Tony told Steve smiling at her and the odd feeling Steve had already get used to came back. He didn't know why but every time he saw Tony and Pepper together all the sudden he felt awkward and wanted to leave "Maybe it's because I was there" he joked.

Pepper smiled and nodded, "Maybe" Steve whispered.

"Hey, I'll be there for you, so that means you don't have to worry" Tony said palming Steve's shoulder.

"You're going to the game?" Steve asked as if it was the biggest gesture.

"Yeah, why not?" Tony said and Pepper shrugged.

Steve didn't know why -didn't want to think about it- but Friday morning, game night, he woke up thinking about Tony.

It added a slight amount of pressure knowing that he will be seeing him play, and Steve found that stupid because Tony had seen him play before. He took a long shower to wipe the thought off.

Thor gave him really weird words about how he was the best captain there is and then they did the team-hug. Tony texted him a Good Luck and winky face and when Steve went out to the field. With all his friends cheering there, Tony cheering there, he felt full. Happily full.

And that's probably what made him win the game.

After being thrown over for about 5 times now, Steve started to feel dizzy.

All the guys came to congratulate him, all but Tony.

It wasn't until he came back from the showers that he saw him.

"Sorry I got lost, but you sweaty and dirty is not something I wish to hug" Tony said behind him and then gave him the tightest hug he ever had, and he was friends with Thor. Steve replied because he felt like waiting for Tony's hug for the whole night "You rocked there" Tony told him proudly.

"Thanks" he barely replied as Tony ended the hug. They stood there, in front of the boy's bathroom for a silent moment. "Anyway, that's only because I was there" Tony said shrugging and Steve laughed.

A little far away there was a little brunette with small sad smile on her face "Now, that explains it" she whispered to herself and started walking away.

"Peggy" Steve called realizing she was standing a few feet away from them. Peggy turned back faking a smile.

"Hey" she replied and Steve walked closer.

"I'll see you later" Tony said before disappearing in the other hall, Peggy watched Tony go and shook her head looking at the floor. _How did she pass through this? So, goddamn obvious_.

"Hey" Steve said with his small and shy characteristic smile. The smile he was giving Tony seconds ago, Peggy thought.

"I was just looking for you to- you know, say congratulations" she said smiling widely this time. Steve looked so happy she couldn't stay sad for too long.

"Thanks" he whispered. And then the hall went quiet again.

"Anyway" she broke the silence "I wanted to give you this" and she got out of her backpack Steve's old jacket "you left in the house the other day and I kept it, but now I think you should have it back" Steve shook his head with sad face now, Peggy clicked her tongue in her head.

"No, it's last year's, you can have that one if you want" Steve said moving Peggy's hand away, but she was persistent, especially because of the glow she just saw on Steve's eyes when he was with Tony.

"No, have it. Is yours, you can give it to Tony if you'd want" she tried to joke but her voice didn't come as she planned to. Steve stared at her.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing, I don't know" she tried to wipe off but the doubt was planted on Steve's head already "Anyway, here, take it, I don't want it" she said taking Steve's hand and making him grab the jacket.

"Peggy- I don't understand- do you wanna talk?"

"No. I'm okay" she said smiling and Steve stared longer, those brown eyes had never been so intelligible.

"You know I still don't know what happened, we can- we can talk about that-"

"I do" she said suddenly. Steve opened his eyes.

"What?"

"I know what happened, so, don't worry you don't have to pretend" she said shrugging making a face, Steve's frown grew harder.

"I'm not pretending anything" he simply said.

"Look, Steve, it's fine, I don't judge" she said putting her hand in her chest "I think there's nothing wrong with that. And besides, you guys kinda make a cute couple" ok, he was lost now. That's thing about her and Tony, sometimes when they babbled, Steve got hell frustrated because he only understood half of the conversation.

"Ok, Peggy, you lost me-

"I know, but it's fine, if you're happy, I'm happy-

"No, I mean, what the hell are you talking about?" he asked her loudly. And Peggy gave him an ugly look.

"Steve, c'mon, you know I'm not stupid"

"No, actually I'm the one feeling stupid here"

"Well then don't, tell him how you feel, I'm sure Stark-

"What?!" the words slipped away from his mouth. _What the actual heck? _

"I'm not blind, I saw the glow on your eyes when you were talking" this was wrong, she was wrong, Steve wasn't into Tony!

"I think you're mistaking stuff around here, Peggs. Tony is my best friend"

"So? It won't be the first time" Steve had to sit down. He wasn't in love with Tony, he _knew_ that.

Oh god, but what about all those odd feelings he had been getting lately? What about the stomach itch? Or the fact that every day he woke up he was eager to go to school just he could talk to Tony?

Or this morning when he woke up thinking about him.

_Oh lord, I'm screwed. _Steve felt that echoing in his head.

"Steve?" Peggy called.

"I have to go" Steve said because hell he needed to think some stuff.

* * *

**ok so after this the fun begins :) this chapter is nothing but anyway have fun reading it. **

**also, gotta love Peggy because she will be the hardcore Stony shipper of the story ok? I can even make her have a tumblr page lol no but srsly if you dont like peggy carter you suck.**

**anyway, tell me what you think, what you'd like to see for the next chapters? what couple background? tell me tell me :33 **


	4. This is bigger than I thought

Weeks passed and things got lot worse. Steve found himself actually in love with Tony but he still wasn't near admitting, yet he knew something serious was going on with him and his new feelings for his best friend.

Steve avoid thoughts and feelings like his life depended on it_. He wasn't gay, Tony wasn't gay. Was that even a problem?_

Suddenly he wasn't paying attention; suddenly all he did was think about Tony while trying not to think about Tony.

Shook his head suddenly in art class when he was day dreaming of drawing Tony looking at him with love in his brown eyes, and he had Pepper right in front of him.

Steve thought that might be one of the biggest problems: Pepper.

The fact that Tony was hopelessly in love with his perfect little girlfriend.

And so many other problems Steve needed more fingers to count.

Eventually Steve stopped avoiding feelings and thoughts he had when he was with Tony and started avoiding _Tony_, not on purpose though.

"There you are" Peggy said behind him as Steve shot close his sketchbook. Steve was in the bleachers of the football field. Totally not avoiding Tony's perfect hair and devil-may-care attitude.

"Hey there" he said smiling almost fakely to his long-time friend and now ex-girlfriend. Peggy sent him a serious look that then changed to a small grin. Steve seriously hated when he couldn't tell what she was thinking.

"Don't think I don't know what you've doing this whole week" she said sitting next to him and taking the sketchbook from his hands.

"What are you even talking about?" Steve pretended.

-o-

"He's mad at me" Tony said taking off his lab robe.

"Why would he be mad at you?" Bruce said focused on the microscope, not really him.

"Bruce can you like actually be my best friend now and stop acting like you're finding the cure for cancer" Tony said annoyed. He really needed a new best friend. At least for these sorts of matters.

"Every single scientific research is important" Bruce said apologetic.

"It's a fucking project" Tony replied dryly.

"Yes, one in which I'm working alone apparently" Bruce took his eyes from to microscope to look bad at Tony. "Anyway, Steve never gets mad at you" Tony made a noise.

"Of course he does. Did you forget about that time and the orange cat? I still think he hasn't forgiven me for that…" he babbled taking his mug of coffee from the special shelf the teacher let them both use.

"Oh please, he stayed mad at you for like two days" he said taking some glasses from the messy table.

"Two full freaking days" Tony said behind him.

"My point" Bruce went back to the microscope and Tony sighed loudly.

"You're no help" he said going outside the lab.

It was lunch time so everyone was out, Tony took his phone and typed Pepper.

"Miss Potts" he said from behind her and Pepper turned giving him a long stare.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I cant have lunch with my girlfriend like a normal teenager?"

"A) You're _not_ a normal teenager, and B) you spend your lunch time making highly dangerous stuff with Bruce at the lab" she said narrowing her eyebrows.

"Well that's just mean"

"Tony…" and he really didn't know why but he told Pepper all his insecurities about Steve. All the things he felt he did wrong and how he'd really hate it if Steve was mad at him.

Pepper was more than his girlfriend; she was his best girl-friend. And Tony trusted her to a way a lot of couples would envy. But there were those times when Tony actually forgot Pepper was his girlfriend. Times when he saw her as his friend, sister, and sometimes even mother. Tony figured maybe that was how love was. But something inside him told him he was terribly wrong.

-o-

"And it's all your fault, honestly" Steve said annoyed looking at his hands. Peggy's laugh echoed the empty field.

"How's that?"

"Well, for starters you're the one who put the idea in my head-

"Hey I didn't put anything in your head. You already had it, you were just being a silly-ass ignoring it for this whole time" Steve looked at her this time.

"How long you think I've been like this?" he asked fastly, Peggy raised her eyebrows playfully and Steve looked back at his hands "I mean, assuming you're right…"

"You're so silly is cute" Peggy said giving him his sketchbook back Steve took it slowly.

"I'm sorry I'm talking to you about this…" he whispered sincerely. Peggy clicked her tongue.

"Oh, cmon' we're stronger than a break up. I told you, Steve, I want you to be happy… I'm your friend remember?" she said looking for his eyes, smiling. Steve looked back at her and smiled too. If he wasn't so stupidly stubborn he could be so happy with Peggy.

"Im screwed Peggs" and that's how easily his smile faded "I can't be in love with Tony"

"I'm going to ask you why and the answer can't be something like 'because he's a guy'-

"It's not that- I mean- I don't really care about that-

"You think Stark does?" Steve never really gave thought to the matter, Tony wasn't judgmental, to Tony love was love, or well _attraction_ in his case, but Steve wasn't really sure to tell.

"I don't know" he said shrugging

"Well unless you're a girl under there, I think Stark is pretty gay for you" Steve looked at her straight. "What?"

"No jokes, not right now" he scolded.

"I'm not joking, Steve. He _is. _You don't notice but he checks you out more than many girls here do" Steve blushed at the thought of Tony checking him as he checked other girls. He shook his head once more. "I don't even see the problem here"

"Ahm- I don't know, he's my best friend. He's not openly gay. _He has a girlfriend?!" _Steve said in a asking tone, Peggy shrugged.

"Still irrelevant"

"You're impossible"

"No, _you_ are making everything impossible because you're scared" and for that moment Peggy's eyes glowed up in a way Steve would call beautiful wisdom. But he wasn't against her point right now.

"Of course I'm scared, Peggy. I love Tony too much to lose him-

And after the words were already out, Steve knew there was no going back. Peggy's mouth shaped into a tiny O and Steve went back to stare at his long fingers.

"Wow, this is bigger than I thought-" the doorbell rang and they went back running. But before…

"Peggy, what I told you in the campus-

"You just realized it" it wasn't a question but Steve replied a quiet 'yes'

"And-"

"You don't want me to talk about it" Steve nodded this time, Peggy shrugged and smiled as she entered her next classroom.

"Well, well" she said behind the guy's head. He turned around and gave her a sympathetic look.

"Gonna sit here, Carter?"

"I thought you already knew French, Stark" Tony shrugged at her and let the chair free for her. "Gentleman, huh"

"Yeah, I know, I'm a man, weird" he set next to her and Peggy could feel the bulb light up in the top of her head. As the teacher spoke Peggy turned around and looked at Tony. "What?" he whispered with a small grin. Tony was attractive, his facial factions were fine, his jaw was prominent and his nose was perfect. Peggy could really see why Steve fell for him. "Look, Carter whatever creepy thing you're thinking about me, I'm flattered. But it's not gonna happen" he joked between whispers. Peggy gave him a small grin.

"oh, if you only knew what I'm thinking about…" she said narrowing her eyebrows and Tony smiled again. There was a minute of silence while Peggy decided how to start. "So…Steve…" was all she could come up with.

"Nope, sorry- I can't help you" he said leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms, pretending to listen to the class for 3 seconds and then looking back at her.

"Help me?" she simply asked, never losing her grin.

"He says he doesn't love you anymore, so I cant help you with that" Peggy hold her laugh. _Of course you don't want to help me get Steve back. _

"Yeah, I know, bummer" she said looking at the dirty floor and then back again to him. "I think he's into someone, tho" she commented under her breath.

"What?" Tony almost yelled, or at least that was how it felt like since they were whispering. Peggy fought the urge to bite her bottom lip.

"Yeah, I think he's into someone… some guy I think…" Tony looked other place but her face and then he leaned closer to Peggy's face.

"You think Steve's gay?" Tony whispered so quietly Peggy was sure she just read his lips and played his voice on her mind.

"Is that a problem to you?" she asked and Tony looked confused for a moment but then he relaxed.

"What? Of course not! I'm ok with that" he replied making a frown. Peggy stared at him suspiciously…_please don't be that kind of idiots_ she prayed in her head. She and Tony didn't exactly get along, but they didn't hate each other either, they were in the same circle of friends, and probably, in Peggy's opinion, share the same kind of love towards Steve.

"So…you're ok with that? Aren't you- uhm- curious yourself?" she tried not so subtly. Tony avoided her look.

"I have a girlfriend, remember?"

"What about before her? Is simple question, Stark. It's not like I'm asking you to cheat on Pepper with a guy…"

"Maybe, I don't really know- I don't care- if it's a dude or a girl- whatever, it's the same to me" Peggy nodded trying to follow Tony's babble.

"What about Steve?"

"What about him?"

Peggy went for it, "Well…you know…he's hot" Tony shrugged.

"Yeah, sure"

"So, you like him?"

"Carter, he's my best friend"_ oh, here we go again_ "of course I like him" Peggy was surprised Tony was admitting to her something like that but then she thought they weren't in the same page.

"No, I mean- like really _really like_ him-" the whisper slipped away from her mouth and never got to Tony's ears because the teacher yelled at them.

"Mr. Stark, Ms Carter, if the class is no interest for you then you might as well go outside" Mrs. Kozlov told them in her characteristic accent. _How come a Russian woman teaches you French? _

"No, no, Irene, if I get thrown out of another class Fury will kill me" Tony explained the teacher. She sent death-stares to both of them and turned back, but no before telling Tony,

"It's Mrs Kozlov, Mr. Stark" Tony looked at her and then at Peggy, he went back to sit on his seat straight and they never spoke until the day was over.

-o-

Steve remembered all those times he fought with Tony, and how hard it was for him to stay away. Because hell Tony was so fresh and funny all Steve worries disappeared when they were together, but right now being with him made Steve worry even more.

Steve kept walking through the halls, praying no one would find him. Not even Peggy. And especially not Tony.

But just like that, just like if his heart had called him down, Tony showed up out of nowhere with that beautiful smile of his. _Steve, don't. _

"Hey you" he said and Steve's butterflies started eating his stomach alive.

"To-tony" _oh so we stutter now. _Steve swallowed. Tony raised one of his perfect eyebrows.

"Yeah, me. Why are you acting weird, Rogers?" he used his playful voice, Steve knew it, but it still made him go more nervous.

"I'm not acting weird, what?" he said so fast it sounded like exactly the opposite. Tony looked at him serious.

"Steve?" Tony called in a low, hoarse voice, and Steve imagined his name sounding like that after a breathtaking kiss. He let his eyes fall to Tony's pink and pounding lips and imagined those lips wide open against his mouth. Tony rolling his tongue and-

"I need to go"_ oh my fucking god_. Steve rushed to the bathroom to wash his face, his thoughts_, his oh so dirty thoughts. _He looked down to the already bulb forming up in his pants and cursed under his breath.

When he got out, thank goodness, Tony wasn't there anymore.

Steve got to his empty house and distracted himself with art and then some gym time with Thor, he had a week vacation from his job for winning the opening game and he wasn't helping at Peggy's house anymore, so lately Steve had more time than he normally did.

Not that he needed much time now. All he wanted now was to keep his mind busy.

Busy from Tony's everything.

Two days he succeeded in that. But on the third day, at 3am, he masturbated at the thought of Tony and him making out in the back of Tony's car.

Steve still felt guilty about that.

And that's when he knew he was actually screwed.

Weekend came slowly and Steve was happy at least because he had a bunch of new drawing and stuff for his club.

"Those are beautiful" Pepper said behind him before it was too late for him to hide the drawing of Tony's hand. Steve tried to remain cool.

"Thanks…" he whispered.

"He has really pretty hands" of course Pepper would see they were men hands. "He works with them?"

"Uhm- yeah- I don't know" Steve tried but Pepper knew better. She sat next to him.

"You know is ok, Steve? Tony would completely understand…" that almost made Steve choke. Really.

"What?" he managed to say.

"You can tell him. He wont judge you. Tony loves you, of course he'll support you" Steve tried to remember if he was this stupid when he was in love with Peggy because lately he didn't understood what people were talking about.

"Pepper, I'm sorry, I have no idea of what youre talking about…" Pepper smiled shyly.

"If youre…_gay_ that's fine, Steve" ok now Steve was pissed off at Peggy.

"What- why are you saying that?"

"Well, Tony said-

"Tony what?" Steve was starting to freak out. _If Peggy told Tony anything…_

"Well, he's got this idea in his head that you were mad at him. But then Peggy told him-

"Oh my god-

"That you were into some guy-

"She didn't-

"It's fine, Steve" she took him by the shoulder this time. "Tony's hurt because you didn't tell him, not because of anything else"

"I- " Steve tried to come up with something but Peggy had screwed up too big. Steve couldn't think of anything better so he let Pepper believed whatever she believed "Is Tony upset?" he simply asked. He had been so selfish he didn't though of what this sudden distance he grew between them would do to Tony. If Steve was dying to talk to him then Tony wouldn't have been much different.

"Well, youre his best friend and you didn't tell him of this big thing you have… he's pretty shocked up" she told him shrugging. Steve didn't reply, he was too busy thinking about Tony feeling bad because of his stupid behaviors. _Damn it. This wasn't supposed to happen yet. _

And that's why next Monday Steve waited for Tony in his regular parking lot.

The red shiny car came through the streets and Steve already felt chickening out.

Tony got out with his classic attitude on and Steve smiled because _hell had he missed watching that_.

Tony stood still when he saw Steve waiting for him, Steve gave some short steps and Tony started walking to the door.

"Tony" Steve called him with anxiety, it was just a couple of weeks but he felt like he had years without calling him.

"Oh, youre talking to me now?" _well, damn it. He was mad. _

"Im sorry" Steve offered but behind Tony's ray-bands he couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"What are you sorry for? The fact that you stopped talking to me for two weeks without a reason or the fact that youre gay and didn't tell me?" Tony said walking and Steve had to run to follow.

"Hey! Don't-" he stood up in front of Tony, and quickly regretted doing so "Don't be like that"

"Oh, so you're the one who's been acting like an ass and yet, I'm the one who has to behave?" Tony walked past him but Steve was quick grabbing him by his arm, he let go as soon as he turned Tony back to him. Steve's heart was rushing for all these sudden actions.

"I'm sorry- what do you want me to say?"

"Ahm, I don't know, _the truth?!" _Tony almost yelled, _almost_. "You told Carter and not me, Steve. How did you think that'd make me feel?"

"I'm sorry. It's not that I didn't trust you, is just- I just didn't want it to be weird between us"

"Why? Because I'm guy? Oh, please I think you know me better than that" Steve looked down because those brown eyes were dark of anger. It broke him.

"Tony is not really what you think" _and it really wasn't, Steve hoped. _

"I think it's exactly what I think…I'm an asshole and you're tired" he whispered and Steve looked at him. He was blaming himself for Steve's attitude.

"No! Tony, of course not!" Steve looked for Tony's eyes with his own this time. But Tony looked elsewhere "No, no, no. This is me. This is all me"

"Yeah, Steve, I'm sure"

"Tony, please-

"I have class" _fuck. fuck.__**fuck. **_

Steve was marveled. And if it wasn't so fucking hurtful, he would've laugh at how pathetic this was.

His friendship with Tony was screwed up even before Steve told him how he felt.

He didn't get to the first class, he was a wreck. An impotent, pathetic, and sad little mess. He kept drawing for the rest of the classes and when he got home he cried like he hadn't before.

That night he hugged the pillow thinking it was Tony instead, and as he fell asleep he made a silent wish to an imaginary star.

* * *

**ok so SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY 100000000 THOUSAND SORRYS**.

**I have no excuse. But ugh, college is a bitch ok? It sucks you totally and fucking dry. **

**Anyway, I loved all your reviews (actually the last one inspired me to update this blog today because that girl was so sweet askldjsf i cant even- so Amy Green -whoever you are- this is for you because, im not lying, your reply inspired me to write this right now and well- this is for all of you guys too, of course) **

**I hope to upload the next episode sooner than this one (and I still have to finish the episode for the other fic but dont worry, im still in here guys, i just have a lot of things to do lately and i had no time left for writing)**

**anyway, i really liked this episode, i still dont know why Im writing almost everything from Steve's POV but what the hell, enjoy (; **

**ps. sorry for the spelling mistakes, I still need a beta reader (I dont even know how that works tho)**

**OHH and also, tell me about the background couples you'd like to see? Im curious...**


	5. Steve's female version

There were many things in his life that Tony Stark hated to have done.

Like admitting to his own mother he had contemplated suicide because of his dad's treatments and/or his broken family.

Like getting drunk and almost make Rhodey stop talking to him.

Or how he pushed Pepper around all the time. And how he always ruined Bruce's quietness.

And then there was Steve.

He didn't regret telling him he was mad. Because he fucking was.

Tony knew it wasn't because Steve just decided to stop talking to him out of nowhere. He knew he was a dick, so it was sort of understandable.

It wasn't either because he told Peggy first- ok yeah, maybe he was a bit mad about that, but he thought that maybe Steve told her just to explain to her why he dumped her-. Tony's reason was much more stupid, but yet insanely hurtful, than that.

It was because Steve was gay. Because Steve _is _gay.

And if he had known sooner. _Oh god, if Steve had known sooner..._

The bitter thought of thirteen year old Tony jerking himself off at the thought of Steve's tight ass rushed into his mind as fast as he tried to repress it and failed.

Tony lost track of how many times he day-dreamed about Steve. He wasn't sure when it all started. For all he cared, it could've been when 10 year old Steve saved him from a couple of 16 year old drunk bullies because he was Tony Stark and he didn't know how to shut the hell up. Tony still remembered Steve cleaning the blood off of his nose gently and those deep blue eyes shining with worry.

Always his hero. Always there for him.

But always so goddamn _straight _that Tony never grew the balls to actually tell him he was crazy about him.

He imagined tons of scenarios and they all ended with Steve either punching him in the face or just plainly stop talking to him.

So he grew a friendship with him instead. And he lost his virginity to Mary Jee Leen at 15 and learned he was in fact bisexual. And with Mary Jee came tons and tons of more girls, and then one day it was Jose Gonzales from last year's vacation trip to Cancun.

Steve was a cute memory, now. His best friend. His hot best friend and never anything more.

Sometimes he would dream about Steve fucking him against a wall but he learned to live with it.

And then Pepper came and every single thought just disappeared.

Pepper was so quiet, good, correct. She was amazing. Tony found himself easily crazy about her in a matter of seconds.

He wasn't sure what was it. Either her blue sparkling eyes. Or maybe the bright blonde hair. But she was everything Tony ever wanted, he thought.

And he hadn't thought of Steve in that way for what felt like ages. But this week all he did was just that.

He was desperate. It had been a week since he technically told Steve to go fuck himself. And he was standing by it. Steve was the one who did wrong.

"Tony, don't be stupid, if you wanna call him just do it" Pepper sort of scolded through the phone. Tony sighed and threw the tiny ball higher.

"I don't want to call him" Tony could feel the judging grin on Pepper's face even though the only thing in his sight was the roof of his room.

"Oh please you've been whining about Steve the whole week" she said sort of annoyed.

"What?! That's offensive, I don't do that, I'm Tony Stark and Tony Stark does not whin-

"Yeah and he neither speaks in third person but yet, here we are" ok, she was just teasing now. Tony sighed heavily, not even Pepper's oddly-showing sense of humor could change his mood. He missed Steve and he was bored. "Look, I gotta go to practice" and now his girlfriend was leaving him to rot "Listen to me, Steve is going through a bigger problem-

"Oh please, there's nothing wrong with digging dudes"

"Maybe not to you, but you know Steve's different. He has enough stuff already for you to just leave him right now" Tony bit his bottom lip and shut his conscience mute "he needs you, Tony"

"But Pepper-

"No, I don't care if he told Peggy first, you'll discuss that later. Steve must be dying to talk to someone who wouldn't judge him and that is you, hun"

"You know, sometimes you can be really annoying"

"Tony-

"Fine, I'll stop by his house, but not tonight, tonight I'm Bruce's"

"Ok, just do it before one of you two gets emotionally severely hurt"

"You can be really dramatic sometimes"

"I saw him crying on art class the other day, Tony" and that seriously shouldn't hurt as much as it did. Fuck, fuck, _fuck_

That's like one the seven deadly sins. One cannot make Steve Rogers cry, that's why you go to hell, at least in Tony's book.

"Tony?" Pepper called.

"Yes?" his voice was hoarse, he knew that.

"Just make sure you fix things with your best friend. I'm here if you need me" Pepper said in a slow whisper, yeah, he hadn't been entirely ok this week either.

"Yeah, ok Pepps" Tony said fake-smiling but it didn't matter, she wasn't seeing him.

"I love you" she said. Tony paused, this moment came always so doubtful to him, not really unnatural, but he felt off.

"Me too" he said and something in his head echoed a final _'I guess...'_

~o~

That night Tony cursed under his breath because he didn't call Steve. He went to bed at 2am thinking in about 30 different ways of how to start. And Bruce and his lack of social skills were beyond unhelpful.

"Damn it" he shot his eyes close and counted 63 crying Steves before falling asleep.

~o~

The day started dark and Tony subconsciously kept his let's-avoid-Steve-in-all-human-way-possible plan on going.

He avoided him in French and got a death-stare from Natasha. He avoided him on the hallway 3 times. He even avoided him in lunch time and went to the lab and helped Mr. Richards and Reed with some new project they were working on.

"I got to meet Stephen Hawkins for Christmas" Reed told him all excited as Tony set, they were on a break because Mr. Richards went to get some stuff done with Fury.

"You know what I got on Christmas? Laid!" Tony mocked him. Reed Richards was dead-boring, but the guy was a smart head. President of The Science Club, much to Bruce's burn -even tho he'll never admit it-, and he was sick-crazy for Sue Storm, head-cheerleader and to Tony's own knowledge a rocket ball in bed, though he'll never admit that to Reed because he didn't want some sick experiment in his locker that made him stink for two weeks.

"You're too funny to be that smart" Reed said with a small grin. Tony was pretty sure Reed was a fanboy about him.

"It is possible, much to everyone's disbelief. And you're too tall to be that lonely. Let me help you, Reed" Reed shook his head and went to a mini fridge to grab a Coke.

"Do you want one?" he showed the Coke up to Tony.

"Yeah sure" Tony replied and Reed handed him one. "So, how's Sue?" Reed choked laughter almost made Tony sigh.

"She's fine... I guess" Tony looked him annoyed "What?"

"You haven't talked to her since I made you do so at my party, have you?" Reed looked away and then down.

"No"

"And why is that?"

"Because... I don't think that's really your problem, Tony" he said narrowing his gaze, like a doubtful kid.

"Oh c'mon, do you have any idea of how many women I've slept with?" Tony said low putting an arm on his shoulder.

"Oh my god, have you slept with Sue?" he raised his head and looked at Tony, he straightened up.

"I have not"

"Oh god. Was she- no, nevermind, I don't want to know. It is over, right?" Reed talked faster than him, and that was a lot.

"Psss it was over even before it started" Tony answered.

"How's that?"

"Don't listen to me and just let me help you"

"That's self-contradictory" Reed narrowed his eyes even more.

"I'm serious"

"You helped Hank…" Reed's voice still sounded doubtful.

"And how is he looking now, huh?" Hank Pym, another geek-head, they were part of Bruce's own trust circle before Bruce joined his characteristic group. Hank was socially conflicted too, and Hank had a thing for Janet van Dyne, a tiny brunette that made Tinker Bell look perfectly sized. Tony met him at one of Bruce's pajama parties -and it doesn't matter how many times Bruce says it's not that, that's exactly what they were-. He was good but dull like Reed and Bruce, and so when Tony found out he had a thing for Janet, he decided to help him to see if he could more interesting once he had a girlfriend. On the past fall dance he made Hank invite Janet and next thing he knew she was kissing him in the dance floor. Tony smiled and Steve told him he had a good heart for wanting his friends to have someone.

And then he remembered what he had been doing all day long.

"Tony?" Reed called him with a still frowned face.

"What?"

"You ok? You look kinda lost there. Do you feel fine?"

"Yeah, it's just- I gotta go" Tony said and went running through the halls. He had like 3 minutes before the bell rang, there was no way he could do it right now, he had to talk to Steve after school.

Tony ran -well, not actually running, more like _walking fast_- until he heard his name from an angry woman's voice.

"STARK!" Tony turned around and before he could even realize it, she pushed him inside an empty classroom.

"Carter, what the hell is your problem?" he said letting go of her hand.

"What the hell is _your_ problem? You have a thing for gay people? Because I still remember that Italian guy bragging about how good you're in bed!"

"Hey, hey- oh yeah, Paolo... yeah he was pretty stuff-

"Oh my god" she sighed before smacking him on the shoulder.

"Hey!-

"Hey you!" she replied mad "Why in hell are you making Steve feel like shit?" she asked angry. Tony stared at her, not sure of why he was feeling bad about Peggy defending Steve. "Stark don't make me slap you this time..." she whispered.

"I don't mean to. He's the one who didn't tell me about that, god, he told you first!" and then she smacked him again "Ow, ok, you have to stop doing that" he scolded her, sharpening his eyes.

"I'll do so when you stop being such an idiot"

"Ok I don't have time for this, Carter, I have things to do" Tony said turning back to the door.

"You honestly think I'm that stupid or are you just as retarded as Steve?" she said looking at her toes and that called Tony's attention.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh yes, you are-

"Peggy"

"Oh we're on first name basis now, huh?-

"Carter!"

"I know Steve doesn't realize it, he and Thor are probably the only ones who don't, but the rest of us do" Peggy lost herself in her own head like he did too. Tony remembered Steve complaining about that.

"I seriously don't know what you are talking about..."

"Do you like Steve?" she asked suddenly.

"He's my best friend, of course I like him!" Tony almost yelled at her. She sighed heavily.

"No! I mean like_ like_ him. Like really really like him. Like... _gay _like him" and that's when it hit him. He started a massive fake laughter that he pray will work one day.

Like 5 minutes after fake laughing,

"Ok, that was lame of me" he said serious and Peggy crossed her arms "but honestly, I don't like Steve that way" Tony said apologetic and Peggy showed an evil smile.

"Oh, so you do think I'm stupid..." she said sarcastic.

"The word is special, Honey" Tony replied with a small smile.

"You're an ass"

"I like you too"

"Ok, stop fooling around, I know you like Steve and I know your stupid enough to screw him over so-

"Ok ok, stop there; I don't need this kind of talk because. I. Don't. Like. Steve. That. Way" he saw slowly against her face. Peggy remained looking at him fiercely.

"You think I don't see it, Tony? How you stop and stare whenever he walks by? Or how you breathe heavily every time Steve some way touches you? All those little things that I'm pretty sure you don't even realize" Tony went silent; he never imagined he was that obvious. He did ogle Steve, more times than he should, more times than healthy "All those things, I see them" there was a long silence before Tony spoke again,

"I still stand by what I said, I don't like Steve that way" he was way more stubborn than Carter, _way more_ "besides I have a girlfriend, remember?"

"Oh yeah right, the- uhm- Steve's female version"

"Now you're just making stuff up"

"She's captain of the volleyball team. She's blonde, she's taller than you" Tony opened his mouth to refute her statement but close it when nothing came out "she's good, she's honest, she keeps you on track. She scolds you; she's one of the only two people on Earth who can get you out of your lab with just one word"

"That's-

"And she's second in art class. She Steve, Stark. She's Steve without a penis" and Tony hadn't been shocked like this in his life until this very moment. Was Carter right? Was Pepper just a Steve replacement? Oh god, that was so screwed up "oh my god, you hadn't realized it-

"What? That my girlfriend and my best friend are the same person but with a tiny gender difference?" Tony said opening his eyes, annoyed and shocked at the same time.

"Well, I wouldn't say 'tiny'-

"Oh, shut up" Tony shot.

"Ok, so, are you going to stop being a first class dick to him?"

"I gotta go, Carter-

"Stark-

"I have to go!" Tony yelled at her and pulled the door to find Steve standing right in front of him "Steve" he said low like a whisper, but in Tony's head it felt like a scream.

"I'm sorry-

"No, I'm- how long have you been standing there?" he had to ask, these walls were way to thin.

"I- I just got here, why?"

"No reason" he replied quickly, nervously. Steve frowned.

"Anyway, Tony, I'm sorry-

"No, dont-

"But I have to-

"No, you don't" Tony said putting his both hands on Steve's shoulders and then quickly moving them. Tony looked up and gave out his best smile "you were an ass, I was a dick. We both behaved wrongly" Steve smiled and something itched in Tony's stomach, _one week without that smile..._ "I'm sorry, I should've been there. And I'm going to, if you let me..."

"Of course"

"Good, then" and there was that awkward silence again. That silence that hurt his ears like the most annoying noise.

"I'm looking for Peggy, have you seen her?"

"She's inside there"

"Ahm- ok, so- I'll go in there" Steve said with that goofy smile of his.

"Sure, sure. Just... Remember, I'm here for you too ok? I might even- be able... to uhm- you know, help" and it hurted, it really hurted to think about Steve with another guy. But if Steve was happy all Tony wanted to be was happy for him.

"Sure"

"We still have to talk to about him" Tony faked a smile and Steve looked down.

"That's not necessary-

"Psss, sure it is. We're going to talk about him, and he better be a piece of cake because I won't let you be with anyone below your type...

"Tony-

"Hey, your ass is not gonna get wasted in some ug-

"Tony!" and Tony looked at Steve like a yelled-at puppy. "I'm still not comfortable with this kind of talk. And we're on the hallway"

"Fine, fine. We have to talk about that too, you can't just judge yourself because there are some mean people out there who say you're a weirdo..."

"I know. The bell rang like years ago, you know that?" Oh shit, Fury was going to kill him. No, he was going to think in many colorful scenarios about how he was going to kill and he was going to write a book about it and make Tony read it to him.

"Bye" was the last thing he said before running like hell to his next class.

~o~

"You're unbelievable" Steve said mad closing the door behind him. Peggy was coming out.

"Steve- hi- what?- oh..."

"I told you not to say anything!"

"Oh you yelled at me about that already..."

"Yes, but now I find you talking to Tony, asking him if wanted me! Did you tell him anything?!"

"No, I didn't, I swear!"

"Then Peggy, for the love of God, stop asking him questions about me. Tony's smart, he'll guess quickly-

"Oh please, Stark's as retarded in this as you are..." And that got Peggy a dirty look from Steve. "Did you hear?"

"Every single thing" Steve said sadly this time. Peggy took his face in her hands and lifted it.

"He was bullshiting me, Steve. Don't think that meant anything. Stark's crazy about you"

"Stop it, Peggy. That's only gonna make it hurt more..."

"But I'm telling the thruth-

"No you're not!" Steve Rogers didn't yell, but many things had changed with Steve Rogers lately so what the hell. Peggy stared "you're just trying to make me feel better" he said calmed this time

"Steve-

"This is driving me crazy and I need you to tell me that he's taken, that there a more fish in the sea or whatever…that is too impossible" Steve whined sitting on a chair that was there.

"I don't think that's really gonna change anything... And yes there are more fish in the sea, but you're stubborn and you love Stark so" Steve covered his face when his hands and then he looked at Peggy deeply.

"I love him" he simply said and the tears didn't come this time, but the feeling still rocked him. But he was already comfortable with it. The idea of being in love with Tony came so naturally to him it was impossible to hate the feeling.

"I know" Peggy said and Steve really wanted to kiss her for being so freaking understandable. "So you're not going to do anything about it?"

"I lost him for a week and I didn't even tell him he's the one I'm gay for, what do you think?"

"I think he's gay for you too"

"Peggy-

"Fine, I'll shut up. But I still think you should come clean to Stark"

"And what if he stops talking to me?"

"I kick him in the balls" she said almost excited.

"That doesn't suit me" Steve said faking a frowned face.

"Well, it suits your awesome best friend, you should at least do it for me" she said with a smiley pout and Steve laughed a little.

"You should go to class"

"I have a free time. What about you?"

"I'm on art group time"

"Pepper's with you on that group right?"

"Yeah, why- Oh, you have to stop thinking about me and Pepper-

"Oh c'mon, I'm right and don't even try to deny it!" Steve opened his mouth but then close it because he really didn't have any good argument. "See how obsessed he is with you?" she asked with a playful grin on her face.

"I better get going" Steve left with a smile on his face and he really shouldn't think too much about Pepper being a lot like him...

Before he got inside the classroom, his phone buzzed in his pocket.

_-'Tonight at your bachelor apartment'-_

_-'Tony, what?'-_

_-'We have unfinished business, and I need to know what you talked to Carter'-_

_- 'it wasn't important'-_

_-'if it was about the dude that's taking your sleep away, it is'_- Steve bit his lower lip and then typed again.

_-'fine, but not my place, yours. I told your mom I'll stop by more and it's been ages since I don't go to your house'-_

_-'you're such a buzz kill; all you want is the extra attention you get in here, you spoiled brat'- _

_-'omg, if you feel uncomfortable we can do it at my place'- _

_-'Steve, please, I'm joking. Of course you're welcome in my house'- _

_-'ok so, tonight. I'll see you then'-_

_-'it's a date ;) '- _one thought had never make Steve felt happy and sad at the same time.

_-'sure'- _Steve put the phone in his pocket again, feeling dizzy already.

* * *

**akdflslfsdlf it took me forever i know, just, be patient, my life is kinda messed up at this moment. **

**anyway, slow build-up, i hate too dont worry. I hope to get there sooner than you may think... Maybe not next chapter but maybe the one after that...**

**enjoy, review, whatevah', remember you can tell me when to stop...**


	6. Selfishness

Steve spent the rest of the day happier than he had ever been.

When the final bell rang Steve felt like walking on a cloud to his old truck but right after he left the hallways a low snarky voice said from behind,

"You ready?" Steve would recognize that voice even if he was deaf.

"What? Now?" he asked turning back to him and Tony shrugged.

"Why not?"

"Well, I need to get dressed and everything" Steve tried to explain but Tony laughed.

"Why? Is not like it's the first time you go to my house let alone meet my parents. Besides," Tony put an arm over Steve's shoulder and walked to the parking lot with him "I'm not your boyfriend, there's no need to impress, you should save that for the other guy" his words were filled with mockery, the good kind though. Steve lowered his head.

"Right, the other guy" he repeated in a low whisper.

"Yeah, the one we still need to talk about"

"Tony-

"Hey, no, you're talking about him, you're talking about him how you talked for hours about Peggy, I don't care"

"Yeah but-

"It doesn't matter if it's a dude, I swear-

"It's not that" Steve said and Tony fell quiet.

"Then what is it?" he asked after a while.

'_It's you'_

"I shouldn't be thinking about him, at all" Steve said closing his eyes and opening them after a minute to find Tony staring at him deeply. Tony looked away.

"Oh" Tony pressed his lips together making a thoughtful face, like if he wasn't sure he screwed up or not. "Why?"

"He's with someone and- it'll never work" Steve shrugged helpless.

"Well, have you tell him how you feel?" Tony asked slowly. Steve swallowed.

"No" he said low and low and not really looking at Tony.

"Then how do you know that someone is just a cover up" Tony said -more like asking- with a shrug "it's a girl isn't it? You think he's fully straight and that's why you haven't told him?"

"No, no- I- he's bi, I'm aware of it"

"Oh" Tony said and kept his mouth like he was going to say something but no words came out of his mouth "ok, I still don't get why you don't say anything-

"It's complicated-

"Then simplify it-

"I can't" he snapped, Tony was pushing him just like Peggy was and the fact that it was _Tony _was unbearable. He wasn't ready. He was afraid. Too afraid.

"Steve- it's okay, just- don't cry" and Tony was touching him, he was wiping the tears away from his cheeks and he was so close. Why was he crying? Since when was he so sentiment?

"Sorry- I don't know what happens with me- I'm stressed"

"That or you're turning into a first class woman" Steve sent him a death stare and saw Tony's bright white teeth.

"I can't leave my truck here"

"Fine, I'll pick you up at 5" and Steve really fought the urge to kiss him goodbye.

_-o-_

"I'm home" Tony yelled entering the lonely mansion.

"Good evening, young Tony" the artificial AI sounded across the whole place.

"Anyone home, JARVIS?" Tony asked losing his sunglasses leaving them at the table.

"Your mother is out with her lecture club" meaning gossip, Tony thought "and Master Stark is in his office"

"Drinking, I bet" Tony said going upstairs.

"Tony" it was his dad's voice, sober-ish. Tony sighed and went downstairs again.

"What?" he asked opening his door.

"I just spoke with Director Fury" he said looking at the window, Tony facing the back of the big chair in front of his dad's expensive desk.

"What are you getting him now?"

"Did you know that Fury rejects my every single offers?" Howard was hoarse, Tony wasn't sure if he was mad or just annoyed because he had to deal with Tony's school stuff.

"Fool" Tony said serious, joking with his dad always seemed hypocrite of him, too hypocrite.

"Did you know that he calls me every single school day between morning and afternoon?"

"Creeper" Tony was looking around now. Papers on the floor, a couple of empty bottles of bourbon.

"Did you know," Howard turned back to look at him, sitting still, very God Father-ish to Tony's taste "that he no longer wants you in his high school until you and I go to therapy?" "Can he actually do that-

"That's beyond the point" Howard interrupted Tony's desperate tries of changing the subject. "What do you tell people about us?" he asked and Tony hold the loud laugh filled with hypocrisy.

"Nothing. I actually avoid talking about you" Tony said and shrugged.

"And why is that? Most people would brag about having Howard Stark for father" and that's when Tony couldn't hold it. He burst into laughter and didn't even bother to hide it.

"Good one. Thanks for the joke, I'll leave now," Tony said walking to the door again.

"I wasn't finished" Tony heard the click of the door's lock and looked back at his father "please Tony, sit" Howard said with a serious face and Tony gave him his 25k smile -hypocrite as it might be-

"I much rather not, thank you"

"Why are you pissing Fury off so much?"

"Ahm- I don't really think that's your business-

"I'm your father!" Howard snapped and Tony was seriously annoyed now.

"Not in practice!" Tony yelled back "I may have your last name and your biological code running through my body but don't think for a second that just because you decided to marry the girl you knocked up and take financial care of both of us that makes you a father" Tony's voice went quieter and quieter and Howard just stared back at him with an unreadable look, Tony cursed in his head because -boy, he hated to talk to his father, under whatever topic; he just hated to be around the man-

"Is that how you feel?" was all he said after a long pause.

"Oh, fuck you" Tony turned back and faced the door "let me out" he demanded without facing his father.

"Tony, we're having this conversation whether you li-

"JARVIS, override code 1-1-3-4-beta-6-5-4-1-1, JARVIS open the door" and the door opened "override code 1-1-4-5-6-beta-4-3-1-1" and he shut the door behind him hard, holding the tears of anger in, like he always did. Tony went to his bedroom and fell asleep because he needed to leave the world for a minute.

_-o-_

For minute turned out to be shorter than he expected, since next thing he remembered was someone knocking his door.

"Tony?" it was the sweet voice of his mother.

"I'm trying to sleep" he said honestly.

"I just wanted to check how you were" she said through the door.

"I'm fine" a bit annoyed maybe, so annoyed he wanted to kill someone maybe, but still fine. There was a long silence but Tony knew better, "you're still in there aren't you?"

"I just wanna talk, honey" she said and Tony could bet she had a grin on her face. Like she would listen, all she wanted was to play good-mother for a matter of 5 minutes until she actually gets bored.

"Did you talk to him?"

"Tony-

"Goodbye, mom" Tony took the covers over his head and shoot his eyes close.

_-o-_

Close until 4:56pm to be exact.

"And then I asked her not to tell anyone" Steve said entering Tony's room with Tony on his back.

"I knew you told her first just because of that" Tony replied locking the door behind him.

"Well, it wasn't just that..." Steve said slowly looking at his hands, he was sitting quietly in his bed.

Tony set next to him and gave him a worried look, "what is it?" Tony asked.

"Is just- the guy- uhm- the guy I like- I don't think he likes me back..." Tony clicked his tongue.

"Well, if he doesn't, it's his loss" Tony shrugged and he knew it was bad to feel good because Steve's possible relationship wasn't going to work, but that's honestly all he felt "who's the guy, anyway?"

Steve took a slow moment to move to that, like he was analyzing his answer, or maybe lost in somewhere, Tony almost clicked his fingers in front of him to catch back his attention.

But Steve moved, "it's you" he said staring at him. And Tony didn't even had a moment to understand what was happening before Steve was all over him. Clumsy hands moving from his face to his chest and Tony hold his grin, processing everything together before mouth-openly reply. That surprised Steve because for a moment he stopped moving and just froze, Tony took that moment to catch a breath and slightly bit Steve's lower lip. "I'm so-

"Shhh" Tony shushed him and grabbed him by the neck slowly pulling him closer and taking his sweet time to put their lips together. Too many times Tony had waited for this very moment, so yes, he was going to enjoy every piece of it.

Steve's mouth welcomed his own like he belonged there since ever. Tony imagined Steve waited for this as much as he did, but the single thought made him a little mad so he shook it.

It wasn't long before Tony had his mouth spread in Steve's really comfortable neck and the sounds coming from Steve's mouth were just... _priceless_.

"Tony" he groaned and Tony left a mark in his neck. "Tony" he said again and Tony went back to his mouth and took it fast and harsh

"Tony" long arms shook him and Tony opened his eyes widely.

"What?" Tony screamed, his heart racing because -of course it was a dream-. Steve set and smiled. Tony stared at him for a long moment and Steve raised his eyebrows waiting for something to come from Tony "oh my god, dinner!" and he remembered, Steve nodded.

"I drove here, I figured it was better if I brought my car since I have to drive myself home too, and since you never came..." he explained.

"Yeah, I- sorry it was just-

"Yeah, your mom told me" Steve said looking down and then at him quickly, Tony looked at the window, the sky was orange-pink "wanna talk about it?"

"No" Tony said, still looking at the window. And that's how easy it was really. Steve understood. Steve cared for him but he knew talking wasn't Tony's deal, so he wasn't going to push him into doing so. He was just going to stand there and wait for Tony to be ready to talk or to cry or to yell, whatever, Steve would always be there.

"What were you dreaming?" Steve asked suddenly and Tony quickly looked at him.

"Why?" he asked fast.

"Well, you said my name..." -Crap, yeah, definitely don't wanna talk about that either-

"Ahmm- I don't remember" Tony shook it getting out of bed. It was when Steve's eyes widen that Tony realized he was full hard on his pants. He looked down and Steve looked away "I'm going to- uhm- the bathroom" he said.

"Yeah, you-uhm do that" Steve said awkwardly as well.

_-o-_

"So you're not staying here tonight?" Tony said when he got out of the bathroom. Showered and clean. Steve was just where he left him "your room is still intact" Steve frowned smiling.

"Really?"

"You're kidding? You're Howard's favorite kid" Steve looked at him between serious and sorry, Tony just shrugged "I mean it, we call it the guest room but no one has really slept in it since you"

"yeah, well, I don't know, I don't wanna perturb" Steve tried to explain but Tony waved a hand at him.

"What about this," Tony said sitting in the edge of the bed, next to Steve "you come live here, and I'll go to your apartment" Steve laughed.

"I don't think you can manage to live like me for a day, you spoiled Ricky Rich" Steve joked.

"Fine, I'll go live with you, you work and I stay home with the kids" Tony joked back but Steve smiled like a kid on Christmas. Tony's stomach twitched "hey, we have something to discuss"

"What's that?" Steve asked lost in his head.

"Uhm- your prince charming- or is he the damsel in distress?" Steve shook his head, frowning.

"I wouldn't call us that"

"Then what would you call you?"

"Nothing- I think"

"You're still uncomfortable with it?" Tony had to ask, because if that was an issue, it was the most important issue.

Steve shook his head and then let out a long breath, "no, it's- it's fine, it's whatever, love is love" Steve said quickly, nervously, and his words hit Tony in the butt, metaphorically.

"You- you love him?"

Steve took a slow moment and Tony fought the urge to smile at Steve's impossible affair with a guy Tony had really started to hate unconsciously.

But Steve took a deep breath before Tony could start dreaming, "I do" he whispered, looking at his hands.

"Well, then- fight for it, is that the regular protocol?" Tony asked getting up and looking for the tiny nano-ball that was never boring. "You really think that's what I should do?" Steve asked emotive. And Tony hated what he was going to do,

"Me? Well, I don't know- you said it was impossible right?"

"Yeah, he- uhm- he has a girlfriend" Tony bit his bottom lip and turned back to Steve.

"Then I think you should forget about him- I mean, you're not the kind of guy that just breaks a relationship, are you?" Tony didn't let Steve reply "it's sick-love, you're only gonna get hurt and I'd really hate to have to kill someone at this young age" Steve tried to laugh but his face was more like if Tony just told him he kicked a puppy "hey-hey" Tony said calling Steve's attention sitting again "it's fine, I know it's hard, but it's for the greater good, maybe- you know- you're not meant to be and all that crap" and it was selfish. Oh it was so selfish because he had Pepper. And he should let Steve live his life. But he was selfish like that.

"I guess"

"There are more fish in the sea" Tony tried to say with a smile but Steve looked so miserable, it was physically impossible for him to smile "you'll be fine, you have me"

"Yeah" but Steve knew he _didn't_, not like he _wanted_ and friendship just wasn't enough.

'_It is for the greater good_' echoed in Steve's head.

* * *

**Sneak-Peek for the next episode:**

_"You're doing it again" he complained. _

_"I'm sorry" he replied dyly. _

_-o-_

_"I screwed up" he said taking a sip from his bottle. He set next to him. _

_"Yeah, I just talked to Pepper..."_

_"What? I wasn't talking about Pepper-_

_"Well, you screwed up with her, too. She said she thinks you're in love with someone else" _

_-o- _

_"I have a couch you can crash into" the guy frowned in reply._

_"You'll invite to your house a total stranger?" he asked._

_"You don't seem harmful to me..." _

_"Now, I think you're a serial killer"_

_"Is that a yes or a no?"_

_"A maybe"_

* * *

**ok, so this one didn't took me much longer. (yay?)**

**and yeah, i know the built-up part is boring but I'll get there, promise. **

**also, two important characters are to come, get excited. **

**and tell me your thoughts, who do you think these two are? (tho i think I really gave it away, already)**


End file.
